Thursday, September 17, 2009

How to tell someone you don't give a fuck

It seems I have to spend an inordinate amount of time telling people online that I don't give a fuck about their worthless dribbling. So I'm trying to come up with creative ways to tell them. Sure, I love the simplicity of "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" but I also like variety.

So far I've come up with:

  • I've checked my "things to do" list. Your mum is right at the top but giving a fuck about you just isn't there
  • NASA sent a deep space probe to the planet Giveafuckaboutyou and confirmed that I wasn't there
  • Your web search "times I give a fuck about you" returned no results. Did you mean "times I don't give a fuck about you?"
  • 404 File not found. You apparently thought you'd find me giving a fuck about you. You were wrong. You could try the following - Find someone else who gives a fuck about you; grow the fuck up; just fuck off
  • Today's lesson is titled "I don't give a fuck about you". Tomorrow's lesson is the same as today's
  • Wanting you to fuck off and giving a fuck about you are not the same thing. So fuck off

And for those who like visual aids, I produced this Venn diagram on GraphJam:

Venn Diagram
Venn Diagram

Feel free to make your own contributions

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