Thursday, April 27, 2006

"I Hear the Voices..."

So here goes, plunging back into politics. Let me start by saying this: there are plenty of things in politics that make me damn angry but I haven't been all politics all of the time for a few reasons. First, I'm trying to have fun and focusing solely on politics might get to be heavy going after a while. Second, there are other people who do it way better than I can, I've linked to some of them before and I will do so again in the future. Third, in my quest to have fun, I don't want to belittle things that are actually important so I've been a little hesitant to focus too squarely on some touchy issues.

That said, some of the stupidity going on is so absurd I can't help but dive in with an angry tirade. For those who haven't been following the musings of the leader of the free world, the title of this post is a direct quote from the man himself, G W Bush. It's part of what he said when being asked if he considered sacking Donald Rumsfeld after some retired generals (people who might actually know something about command competence) said Rummy was a useless pigfucker who should be taken out and shot. Geedubya said that despite hearing the media and the voices he was "the decider" (which sounds like an excellent name for an underwear pervert). What stuck with me was his reference to hearing voices. It explains everything.

He's completely fucking insane.

Georgie boy has gone all 6th Sense on us and he's hearing voices. I imagine this will be his defense in later life: "the voices told me to do it." Yes, the voices told him to invade Iraq even though the people who actually had a clue what they were talking about warned him what a stupid idea it was. The voices tell him life is better in Iraq now despite the deaths of tens of thousands and the ongoing horror of daily life there. The voices told him to award award no-bid multi-billion dollar contracts in Iraq to Halliburton who then sent soldier out without adequate armour or resources (although that was pretty obviously Cheney's voice).

And now it seems the voices are telling him that military action, up to and including nukes, against Iran is a good idea. This is despite the fact that it's morally reprehensible, strategically suicidal and straight-up insane. Some explanation:

Morally reprehensible: This requires no explanation. If you think the act of nuking Iran is not morally reprehensible, well, to borrow a phrase I read recently on another blog: fuck you in the neck with a butter knife.

Strategically suicidal: The leader of Iran, President Ahmadinejad, is not Saddam. He may not be the greatest guy in the world, but within Iran he's fairly popular and kinda-sorta democratically elected. So you can't fool anyone into thinking you will be popularly welcomed if you "topple" him. Also, Iran has A BIG FUCKING ARMY! The US and allies are already overstretched. It simply isn't feasible to open up war on another front. And nobody in Iran is going to sit quietly if you start bombing them. Step 1 would be a real bloodbath in Iraq as the Iranian army sweeps in. Step 2 would be "goodbye Israel" - as in, no longer existing on the map.

Insane: You would get zero international support for this. Okay, maybe the world's most pathetic lapdog, John Winston Howard, would sign on but I can't imagine Blair getting involved. From erstwhile allies you would get overwhelming condemnation, I would expect protests/rallies/riots all across Europe. And the wave of violence that would be unleashed across the middle east is too horrible to contemplate. And I'm more than a touch worried how Australia's neighbours to the north would react as well. An inevitable corollary effect would be the complete collapse of the US and probably the world economy.

So, politically, why would he say these things? Possibility one: it's a bluff. Caint afford to look weak tuh those mooozleeems. Guess what shit-for-brains? Anyone sensible thinks it's a bluff. Bluffs don't work if everyone knows it's a bluff. Dubya must be a shit poker player. Possibility two: he's completely fucking insane and he really means it. In which case...

Would some intern please give him a blowjob so he can be impeached?

9 comments:

zenstar said...

the full quote is actually:
Bush: I say I listen to all voices but mine's the final decision and Don Rumsfeld is doing a fine job. He's not only transforming the military, he's fighting a war on terror - He's helping us fight a war on terror. I have strong confidence in Don Rumsfeld. I hear the voices and I read the front page and I know the speculation but I'm the decider and I decide what is best and what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the Secretary of defense.
found here.
i must say that in spite of his voices references, he does seem to want to keep old rummy in charge.
bush is not good at public speaking.
he needs an interpreter before oopening his mouth.

Mr Angry said...

Yes Zenstar, I saw the whole quote. What I did was take a snippet out of context to make Bush look even more stupid. Standard method of scoring political points although it's almost a superfluous effort in Bush's case. While I was looking for it, I found a few other choice quotes that outraged me - I will be posting on them in the future.

zenstar said...

wow.. you respond fast :)

Mr Angry said...

Heh, I just happened to be on at the time Zenstar. Now go respond on your blog! :)

zenstar said...

lol... i already have :)

Mr Angry said...

OK, I'm done for now!

Michelle said...

Personally, I can't decide which is worse, either he gets his ideas from Rumsfeld, the voices in his head which come from God/Satan/an ancient Egyptian dog, or god forbid he actually comes up with the stuff himself.

epikles said...

yes, he's a fucking moron, and yes, he's probably insane, but he isn't the first of either to be america's president and he probably won't be the last. i didn't think we were going to make it through reagan. that guy had a soothing manner but zero brain. this guy's got a jarring manner and a brain in negative territory. he's the 'coyote ugly' of presidents.

Mr Angry said...

Michelle, look into those vacant piggy eyes of his... I don't think he comes up with much by himself. I'm surprised he can eat without stabbing himself in the face with a fork.

Tom: nice dose of jarring reality there. You reminded me of a t-shirt I saw: Nixon minus brains equals bush.